One issue that is of interest to all fathers and mothers is raising sons and daughters. What are the main precautions to be considered when the little ones arrive at our home? How to deal with them during their growth? And when to consider that they have grown enough to become independent? In this post, we share what the Word of God teaches us about the subject and how we have applied these principles in our family.
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3 Main Resources to Invest in Raising Your Sons and Daughters
Children are a blessing from the Lord to parents. And if you also want to be a blessing to your children, you need to invest these 3 resources in your relationship with them:
Be Firm
Parents need to be firm in dealing with their children. Only then will the commitment of true love be present in the relationship between them. Children, even when small, are always attentive to the consistency with which their parents treat them. They want – and need – to be corrected, instructed, and affirmed in order for them to grow up to be successful adults.
The Bible says that foolishness is linked to the child’s heart, but the rod of discipline will deliver him (Prov 22:15). They are not yet ready to deal with different everyday situations. Therefore, we need to be always attentive to our children’s behavior and take advantage of every opportunity to correct their actions and motivations. From a young age, children need to be corrected. And so over the years, we will be able to cultivate noble values in your hearts.
Robert Morris says that children must be trained, teenagers must be taught, and adults must be trusted. We see this clear distinction of phases in the Word of God, and each moment requires a kind of appropriate approach from parents.
When Micael and Sara were minors, we used rubber slippers on their backs when necessary, mainly because of the noise it causes. Today, at 8 and 7 years old, they don’t wear slippers anymore. Instead, we fix them by talking more seriously and depriving them of benefits for a few hours, like TV and playing outside with friends. Later, we will just respect their decisions, as they will be adults with the right to their own choices.
Train up a child in the way he should go;
Proverbs 22:6
even when he is old he will not depart from it.
Express Love
Parents need to express their love to their children consistently. In a world so permeated with evil and indifference, our homes are the only environment where we can ensure that true love is delivered to our children. But they don’t always realize the sincere love that exists in our hearts, because we fail to express our intentions properly.
So something that we practice in our family is to communicate love in different ways. We learned from Gary Chapman that there are different ways that love is perceived, varying from person to person. He mentions 5 main expressions of love, which are: words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, physical touch, and gifts. We tend to distribute love to each other by balancing these different forms of expression and then repeating them constantly.
An example of this is what we call the boys’ ride when I take Micael for a tour with me. On those occasions, we talk a lot, do some chores, spend time together, hug each other, and whenever possible give you a simple gift as a gift. Another simple but super important way of expressing love is our habit of reading the Bible and praying with our children every night. We lay our hands on their heads and affirm them, creating their future with words of blessing.
And have no doubt that the greatest expression of love for your children is the correction. They wait for their correction because they need someone, different from the average, who really cares about them. Someone who doesn’t just offer sweets, but also takes them to the dentist. In the future, your children will be an honor for you if you pay the price of discipline as they grow up.
Whoever spares the rod hates his son,
Proverbs 13:24
but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.
Be an Example
Parents need to educate by their own example. The way we act influences our children’s behavior more than our words. And both are important. They need to observe our attitudes consistent with our speech.
There is a saying that says “do what I say, but don’t do what I do”. It just doesn’t work well. Much more than just your words, it is the sum of more practical words that shapes your family’s culture. And so your children develop habits that will likely accompany them for the rest of their lives.
Therefore, never consider that your children do not understand yet, or are not aware. They are always looking for you as it is the reference they can trust. If you want to raise your children to be successful adults, start by adjusting in your routine the attitudes necessary for them to set a good example to follow.
“The righteous who walks in his integrity — blessed are his children after him!”
Proverbs 20:7
Conclusion
You will be raising your sons and daughters to be successful adults by being the example for them that they need, expressing your love in a way that they perceive you well, and in everything being firm in dealing with them. Being firm is not optional. So stay firm in the way you talk to your sons and daughters, how you correct them, and love them consistently.
When you finish reading this text, what do you need to adjust in the way you relate to your sons and daughters? What practical attitude do you feel is necessary to improve their education? Start investing better in their future today. And soon you will be rewarded for being a blessing in the lives of your sons and daughters.
Prayer: God, thank you so much for my sons and daughters. I recognize that they are a blessing from You to our family. And my sincere prayer is that You will help me to be a blessing for my sons and daughters as well. Please help me to be steadfast and firm in the way I love them and prepare them for a future of success, in the name of Jesus. Amen.
What is the Holy Spirit saying to you?
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